I wander in a crowd aimlessly.

Merely seeking refuge from the household
that has burdened me.

Burdened me
with endless tutors, recitals.

Expectation after expectation.

Medal after medal.

Why?

Why must I endure all of this?

Why are my burdens becoming harder and harder to carry?

Why do people base your worth as a person on you achievements,

on your abilities?

Why?

Question after question.

Frustration building up.

Yet I retreat with a knowing sigh and brush away strands of stray hair.

This is my life. My fate, planned out before me.

Is this how I really want to live?

I guess so...how ironic.

My future is so clear...it should be. But I can't help but think that
as each day passes, my future becomes harder to see.

Am I being ungrateful?

It's not being ungrateful. It's securing my chance of winning this
gamble. The stakes are high. Perfection is a must...I must continue.
For my future.